One of the real joys I have found since living in Cambodia is receiving text messages from non-native English speakers. My first phone disappeared so I lost a lot of the classic text messages I'd collected which was far more upsetting than losing the hardware. Now my second phone's inbox is already full with many more great messages from my cambodian friends & work colleagues. I love the testing & use of newly learnt vocabulary, the openness & sometimes emotional rawness & often just the sheer bizarreness of them. So to share just a few of them with you, they really make me smile & are very precious to me.....
The text that inspired this blog, a review by a friends 3 year old daughter of a film I lent them - "Lion king made A cry because she pitied the lion's baby whe his dad died and the hiana willing to kill him. That's blasted cartoon. Maybe I'll need more of them. X good night."
When I texted my friend to say a man was trying to break into my hotel room - "I think you should tell him that: it is not enough space for him and I am feeling tiredness. I wanna sleep without any distraction. Maybe another time! What do you thing about my advice?"
After sending a text to my 'suicidal' friend, their response was - "I don't care about mine but I do care about you. I'd like to see you fine. We will talk later. Could you give me an advice about what cause and effect poverty? Thanks in advance! I don't wanna die anymore because I'd prefer to see you beforehand. Cheer up please!:);)!" Or another time - "I'll endeavor to be good and againsting with my mental breakdown. X." Or a particular favourite - "I do not feel good to do. Because I am depressive and have stigma feeling."And finally after my suggestion that maybe they will feel better soon - "Sorry maybe not because it is congenital." When I showed my good friend some of the depressive text messages they have sent me over the last year they read silently & then smiled proudly & said - I never realised that my English is so clear, this makes me very happy. So we are focusing on the quality of the expression of emotion rather than the psychology that lies beneath!
When I was in Phnom Penh for a disastrous meeting at the MoH, my work colleague back in the town I'm based at sent me this mid morning, coffee break time, message - "Come on Dr. E, we are waiting for you at cafeteria. No you no fun."
In the same week one work colleague was "not so fine" because a rat had eaten all his ducklings I also received this text - "Sorry for replying you late because I was waiting for killing cat which has eaten my chicken and I left my phone in my back. Maybe see tomorrow. Enjoy your work."
On finding out my annual meeting with the hospital had been cancelled, for a third time - "What! It cancelled again? But u r so important for patients. They really treasure u as their angel. They love u. Happy victory day! Have a nice holiday! X"
From my lovely assistant - "Because we r familiar. We r both angry birds;-). X" So true...
On telling my assistant about someone else's annoying behaviour - "Ah... Maybe he wanted yr reaction. He likes yr reaction,especially when u r angry ;-). X" So wise....
Medical advice - "I went to see S's father. S and Him probably misunderstood my education or tended not to listen. I told her to clean the wound with soap and water first then anticeptc but they cleaned Alcohol 96% so the wound a bit swollen by burning of Alcohol. That's amazing thing."
During a rough patch at the hospital when any training was aggressively rejected, my assistant demonstrates my terrible influence on her vocabulary - "Hope this cheers u up while u r teaching the bloody doctors. X" When I then responded it was not going very well again - "I also bother to hear this. They don listen to us not at all. I think because we women. By the way, snack can help u ;). X" She knows me so well!
The first & only text I have ever received from my Cambodian mother - "dear esther happy birthday I hope that ynu have had avery good day I miss you very much love from S"
From a work collegue running late - "Sorry 5 minute late ok. Because Cambodian."
Setting a dinner date - "Good Evening my Dr. Sorry for being to reply to you late. Hope you are not irritating. What time is good for you to go for dinner at the forest tonight? I'm looking forward to seeing your text. ;-(." Or "So could you wait for me a minute. You are a person who try me eat more food. Thanks!" And "Yes, i did. Why didn't you have? You should have dinner, otherwise you will definitely not have any energy. Am I right? Don't be destroyed your health. ;-)"
Capacity building in motion - "Sorry no karaoke because I must respect to all females."
Or when I joked in a text about betting how late a meetng would happen - "Know I don't because I promiss with you to stop buying lottery so even bet I'd rather include as well. See you soon at contin. X"
About scabby dog - "I cannot make a good communication with human too but dog I can stop her having sex either male or female. First injection and second castration. Any way I wanna cheer you as I am stupid person that irritated you yesterday so I promiss to treat her as your suggestion"
After another great day at the office my assistant felt the need to send this - "u r terrible for doctors here but u r lovely n nice to patients :-)"
Asking how english class went which I had helped with the prep - "It went very well because yours. Thanks! But if you came to talk, it would be best. ;-)!"
Pertaining to my landlady - "I think so. She said that she is woman, she doesn't have skill n energy as man. These works are for men. That is just excuse. Not appreciate with her!"
On a technical note - "Good morning Dr. Est. I hope you had a nice weekend. I'm really sorry in letting you know this information because I'm feeling guilty. I took your phone's memory to the phone shop to mimic them for you but unfortunately those picture's gone. Even thought, they tried to find it many time. I'm sorry in making your photograph are lost. Seriously! ;-("
Or for reassurance - "good night. Glade to see you smile. I'm vex irritable when I see you up set. Most of Cambodian doctors are stupidity. Don't be mind" Or "If i know whatever in your head but i still trust you are not idiot." Or "I will try. That is good to hear that u meet some nice men. I know when m very upset worry, i always think of u. U always make me feel strong n positive to myself. Thanks. I do love u. Take care n sleep well! X"
In work - "I'm very sorry Dr Est. The child has temperature 38, RR 38 and BP 60 over 40? Please forgive me."
Making new connections - "Hey Esther.sorry i'm late reply back to u. How are u?i'm happy when u know my phone number.ok i really happy when i know ur phone to.thank u see u soon.goodlucky" followed by "Okay i can go to ur house tomorrow. But can u change time for me. Maybe u free or not. Because i need wasthy God at chuchr. If u agree or not.reply back i hope"
On telling my assistant about some other NGO workers - "what! They r such a super rude people"
After my khmer teacher coined me it elicited this message - "Hi! I saw your post on face book. How is your feeling now? I felt so surprised that you did coining. It is so painful. Hope u are better. Take care! X"
My feelings of inadequacy & failure are contagious - "I don't feel happy too. I don't know why they are very idiot and stupid like this. Why they don't ever do a reflection on their treatment right or wrong or follow your advice. And it is because I'm not a good translator. ;-( sorry!!!" or "Ok I'll try as your support and trust to me. I'll do all my best. You don't make me up sad. I just hate my self. See you on Monday. Xs!" These are not text written by me but it is scary how close they are to being something I may write!
Expanding vocabulary - "I don't understand the word boundaries. So don't understand your text."
Or occasionally also helping me with my limited vocabulary - "Could you order baycha with chilli and what I always like please. Sorry i can't live without eating. X" - knowing full well that it is about the only dish I can order in Khmer! Sometimes its easier to just give up when it all gets too difficult - "So why i don't really like doing text or email because it can make confusing as my English is very poor."
I have no idea what this text is even about but it pretty much sums up my time trying to communicate here - "How terrible it is? What we should have but can't get it. It will make we up set like me never cheer up."
The text that inspired this blog, a review by a friends 3 year old daughter of a film I lent them - "Lion king made A cry because she pitied the lion's baby whe his dad died and the hiana willing to kill him. That's blasted cartoon. Maybe I'll need more of them. X good night."
When I texted my friend to say a man was trying to break into my hotel room - "I think you should tell him that: it is not enough space for him and I am feeling tiredness. I wanna sleep without any distraction. Maybe another time! What do you thing about my advice?"
After sending a text to my 'suicidal' friend, their response was - "I don't care about mine but I do care about you. I'd like to see you fine. We will talk later. Could you give me an advice about what cause and effect poverty? Thanks in advance! I don't wanna die anymore because I'd prefer to see you beforehand. Cheer up please!:);)!" Or another time - "I'll endeavor to be good and againsting with my mental breakdown. X." Or a particular favourite - "I do not feel good to do. Because I am depressive and have stigma feeling."And finally after my suggestion that maybe they will feel better soon - "Sorry maybe not because it is congenital." When I showed my good friend some of the depressive text messages they have sent me over the last year they read silently & then smiled proudly & said - I never realised that my English is so clear, this makes me very happy. So we are focusing on the quality of the expression of emotion rather than the psychology that lies beneath!
When I was in Phnom Penh for a disastrous meeting at the MoH, my work colleague back in the town I'm based at sent me this mid morning, coffee break time, message - "Come on Dr. E, we are waiting for you at cafeteria. No you no fun."
In the same week one work colleague was "not so fine" because a rat had eaten all his ducklings I also received this text - "Sorry for replying you late because I was waiting for killing cat which has eaten my chicken and I left my phone in my back. Maybe see tomorrow. Enjoy your work."
On finding out my annual meeting with the hospital had been cancelled, for a third time - "What! It cancelled again? But u r so important for patients. They really treasure u as their angel. They love u. Happy victory day! Have a nice holiday! X"
From my lovely assistant - "Because we r familiar. We r both angry birds;-). X" So true...
On telling my assistant about someone else's annoying behaviour - "Ah... Maybe he wanted yr reaction. He likes yr reaction,especially when u r angry ;-). X" So wise....
Medical advice - "I went to see S's father. S and Him probably misunderstood my education or tended not to listen. I told her to clean the wound with soap and water first then anticeptc but they cleaned Alcohol 96% so the wound a bit swollen by burning of Alcohol. That's amazing thing."
During a rough patch at the hospital when any training was aggressively rejected, my assistant demonstrates my terrible influence on her vocabulary - "Hope this cheers u up while u r teaching the bloody doctors. X" When I then responded it was not going very well again - "I also bother to hear this. They don listen to us not at all. I think because we women. By the way, snack can help u ;). X" She knows me so well!
The first & only text I have ever received from my Cambodian mother - "dear esther happy birthday I hope that ynu have had avery good day I miss you very much love from S"
From a work collegue running late - "Sorry 5 minute late ok. Because Cambodian."
Setting a dinner date - "Good Evening my Dr. Sorry for being to reply to you late. Hope you are not irritating. What time is good for you to go for dinner at the forest tonight? I'm looking forward to seeing your text. ;-(." Or "So could you wait for me a minute. You are a person who try me eat more food. Thanks!" And "Yes, i did. Why didn't you have? You should have dinner, otherwise you will definitely not have any energy. Am I right? Don't be destroyed your health. ;-)"
Capacity building in motion - "Sorry no karaoke because I must respect to all females."
Or when I joked in a text about betting how late a meetng would happen - "Know I don't because I promiss with you to stop buying lottery so even bet I'd rather include as well. See you soon at contin. X"
About scabby dog - "I cannot make a good communication with human too but dog I can stop her having sex either male or female. First injection and second castration. Any way I wanna cheer you as I am stupid person that irritated you yesterday so I promiss to treat her as your suggestion"
After another great day at the office my assistant felt the need to send this - "u r terrible for doctors here but u r lovely n nice to patients :-)"
Asking how english class went which I had helped with the prep - "It went very well because yours. Thanks! But if you came to talk, it would be best. ;-)!"
Pertaining to my landlady - "I think so. She said that she is woman, she doesn't have skill n energy as man. These works are for men. That is just excuse. Not appreciate with her!"
On a technical note - "Good morning Dr. Est. I hope you had a nice weekend. I'm really sorry in letting you know this information because I'm feeling guilty. I took your phone's memory to the phone shop to mimic them for you but unfortunately those picture's gone. Even thought, they tried to find it many time. I'm sorry in making your photograph are lost. Seriously! ;-("
Or for reassurance - "good night. Glade to see you smile. I'm vex irritable when I see you up set. Most of Cambodian doctors are stupidity. Don't be mind" Or "If i know whatever in your head but i still trust you are not idiot." Or "I will try. That is good to hear that u meet some nice men. I know when m very upset worry, i always think of u. U always make me feel strong n positive to myself. Thanks. I do love u. Take care n sleep well! X"
In work - "I'm very sorry Dr Est. The child has temperature 38, RR 38 and BP 60 over 40? Please forgive me."
Making new connections - "Hey Esther.sorry i'm late reply back to u. How are u?i'm happy when u know my phone number.ok i really happy when i know ur phone to.thank u see u soon.goodlucky" followed by "Okay i can go to ur house tomorrow. But can u change time for me. Maybe u free or not. Because i need wasthy God at chuchr. If u agree or not.reply back i hope"
On telling my assistant about some other NGO workers - "what! They r such a super rude people"
After my khmer teacher coined me it elicited this message - "Hi! I saw your post on face book. How is your feeling now? I felt so surprised that you did coining. It is so painful. Hope u are better. Take care! X"
My feelings of inadequacy & failure are contagious - "I don't feel happy too. I don't know why they are very idiot and stupid like this. Why they don't ever do a reflection on their treatment right or wrong or follow your advice. And it is because I'm not a good translator. ;-( sorry!!!" or "Ok I'll try as your support and trust to me. I'll do all my best. You don't make me up sad. I just hate my self. See you on Monday. Xs!" These are not text written by me but it is scary how close they are to being something I may write!
Expanding vocabulary - "I don't understand the word boundaries. So don't understand your text."
Or occasionally also helping me with my limited vocabulary - "Could you order baycha with chilli and what I always like please. Sorry i can't live without eating. X" - knowing full well that it is about the only dish I can order in Khmer! Sometimes its easier to just give up when it all gets too difficult - "So why i don't really like doing text or email because it can make confusing as my English is very poor."
I have no idea what this text is even about but it pretty much sums up my time trying to communicate here - "How terrible it is? What we should have but can't get it. It will make we up set like me never cheer up."
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