Monday, November 21, 2011

Welcome to Cambodia - we hope you enjoy your stay


More blog radio silence I’m afraid, this time because I have been acting as tour guide to my parents for the last 3 weeks.  They have now left and the consensus was that “a good time was had by all”. If capacity building doesn’t work out for me here perhaps I could establish a tour company instead.

A sample itinerary would be as follows and concentrates on using as many modes of transport as possible and purchasing many scarves;

Day 1 – Fly to PNH (mode of transport 1), parentals set the tone of visit by suggesting we start on the Angkor beer at 10am. Lazy jet lagged day with drinks and food at FCC. Icy-cold 5 star hotel accommodation.
Day 2 – PNH – tour guide has a meeting at URC office so clients go on a ‘walking tour’ to street 240 for start of scarf buying marathon. Visit Royal Palace, National museum and lunch at Daughters of Cambodia. Respect clients’ request to not go killing fields and S-21. Dinner at Ocean.
Day 3 – PNH – Boat trip to Mekong Island (mode of transport 2), lunch at Friends then walk along riverside (mode of transport 3). Dinner at Ngon.
Day 4 – Travel up to Battambang by private taxi  (mode of transport 4). Accommodation my salubrious house by Wat Sangker. Dinner at Flavours of India, pre-dinner drinks at Geordie’s Gallery.
Day 5 – BTB – Meeting at hospital so “acclimatization day” for clients. Happy hour at Café Eden & dinner White Rose.
Day 6 – BTB – Bamboo train & Phnom Sampeau with David by Tuk Tuk (mode of transport 5). Dinner at Chinese BBQ.
Day 7 – BTB – Trip to Banon and surrounding area (mushroom farm, vine yard). Happy hour & dinner at Bambu hotel.
Day 8 – BTB – Tour of BTB referral hospital and then Tuk Tuk trip to Ek Phnom district and ‘cottage industry’. Dinner at Bamboo Train Café and Circus show.
Day 9 – Travel to Siem Reap by Boat. Accommodation Smiley’s Guesthouse. Dinner at The Sugar Palm.
Day 10 – SR – Small circuit of Angkor Wat. Happy Hour and dinner at FCC.
Day 11 – SR – Grand circuit of Angkor Wat. Dinner Il Forno.
Day 12 – SR – Trip to Silk farm and markets. Cocktails at Elephant Bar & Dinner at Abacus.
Day 13 – Private taxi to Kampong Cham. Accommodation Mekong Hotel. Lunch at Lazy Daze, trip to Rubber Plantation, dinner at Mekong Crossing.
Day 14 – Bus to Sen Monorom (mode of transport 6). Accommodation Phanyro Guesthouse, dinner at The Greenhouse.
Day 15 – SM – Elephant Valley project for visit, dinner and accommodation (hammock).
Day 16 – SM – Travel back from EVP by moto (mode of transport 7). Rest day. Lunch at Chum Nor, dinner at Banana.
Day 17 – SM – Trip to waterfalls, coffee plantation and sea forest. 
Day 18 – Trip to Kratie by shared taxi/minibus (mode of transport 8). Accommodation You Hong, Dinner at Balcony bar.
Day 19 – K – Trip to Kampie and dolphin boat trip, tuk tuk ride to turtle conservation project. Accommodation & dinner at Balcony Bar.
Day 20 – K – Trip to Koh Trung, horse & cart  ride (mode of transport 9).  Lunch at Red Sun Falling. Afternoon trip to another Wat. Dinner and many drinks at Balcony Bar.
Day 21 – Trip back to PNH by shared taxi/minibus. Accommodation ridiculously overpriced 5 star hotel. Visit Wat Phnom. Dinner at Sovanna.
Day 22 – Fly out of PNH.

The cost of me organizing the tour, including all booking of accommodation, transport and meals and acting as a half-arsed interpreter is just the cost of all my lodging, transport & food. This I’m afraid will probably reduce the clients of my tour business to my family and possibly only my parents!

However the feedback from the tour has been good.

Ma Wilson’s top 5 highlights
1)   Boat trip from Siem Reap from Battambang through the floating villages on the Tonle Sap Lake
2)   The scenery – especially the paddy fields
3)   Balcony Bar in Kratie – sundowners and story telling on the terrace with Andrew (owner)
4)   Visiting silk farm in Siem Reap
5)   Seeing me – well she is my mother after all and clearly this should have been listed as #1

Poppa-Bear Wilson’s top 5 highlights
1)   Sweet and Sour Pork – White rose Battambang ranked first place with Balcony bar a close second and this is really his #1
2)   Trip with David the tuk tuk driver around Battambang to see local industry
3)   Having drinks and good conversation with various young female backpackers – Cat & Sarah I’d like to apologize for my father
4)   Mekong Island visit in PNH (before Mum bought the 14 scarves!)
5)   Visiting Banon Temple and obtaining two new wives

Tour guide’s top 5 highlights
1)   Washing the elephants at the Elephant Valley Project
2)   Staying in a 5 star hotel in Phnom Penh and using a duvet even with the AC switched off
3)   Horse and cart trip around Koh Trung & seeing a snake
4)   Breaking down in Tuk Tuk after seeing dolphins and entertaining local children for 2 hours
5)   Evening spent with Tania at Banana in Sen Monorom

There were however some complaints and annoyances;
1)   The Wat next door to my house caused unacceptable noise pollution with its new sound system at what was considered by my clients to be an antisocial hour.
2)   The shared taxi journey from Sen Monorom to Kratie with the 23 passengers and chickens was not appreciated as the ‘authentic Cambodian experience’ it was intended to be. However Pop Wilson regained his GSOH in time to enquire when we arrived in Kratie if it was Phnom Penh and where was the airport?
3)   The private taxi from Siem Reap to Kampong Cham was also not considered to be ideal by the clients who felt that the price and various requests to fit in ‘wives, mothers and sisters’ were both stretching the truth and taking the piss.
4)   The Mekong Hotel manager who tried to sell us shared taxi over a bus ticket wins the least liked Cambodian award. The two Australian women we met in Sen Monorom were less than impressed with paying more than a bus ticket to leave 4 hours earlier than the bus, have practically the same number of passengers as a bus which arrived at the same time in Sen Monorom despite the bus being an hour late. Gideon the tuk tuk driver won extra points for advising on the bus option and hence enters my top ranking Cambodian list.
5)   Sweating was an issue, however this has been a complaint from previous visitors. As this is the tropics, the management reserves right to ignore all sweat/heat related complaints.
6)   My clients were unsettled by the torture/khmer rouge routine at the circus. It was probably a good thing that I respected their request not to visit the Killing fields and S-21.
7)   Witnessed random animal & child cruelty unsettled my clients.
8)   The hospital visit was not ‘enjoyed’ but it was acknowledged that it would result in better understanding of my situation the next time I have a rant over skype.
9)   A series of emails from the UK caused a slight shadow over my holiday but as legal action is being threatened I shall remain cryptic.


2 comments:

  1. WOw you have shared a wonderful blog.I liked the idea of becoming guide to our parent.It seems that you really had enjoyed your guide job.Thanks a lot.

    Hotels on International Drive Orlando

    ReplyDelete
  2. This tourguide is happy to see our elephants made it onto your highlight-list! And your evening with Tania must have been crazy, I'll have to hear the stories next time we meet! Kim

    ReplyDelete